![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
I learned something today
Nov. 12th, 2010 10:51 pmI spotted a bumper sticker today that I didn't understand so I asked. The message was "D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F."
Imagine my surprise when I discover that it came from this song
( right here! )
Imagine my surprise when I discover that it came from this song
( right here! )
Even better than asshat
Oct. 29th, 2006 07:06 pmAs much as I love using "asshat" as an insult, I think I just found a better one. It's not my own - it was a poster on Whedonesque but I can't find the thread anymore.
Anyway, the word is ASSCLOWN. Now how sweet is that? ASSCLOWN! ASSCLOWN!
I have my word for the day!
If you were the poster on that thread, please tell me and I will give you all credit for such a sweet, sweet word.
Now I just have to think of a way to slide it into next week's team meeting!
Anyway, the word is ASSCLOWN. Now how sweet is that? ASSCLOWN! ASSCLOWN!
I have my word for the day!
If you were the poster on that thread, please tell me and I will give you all credit for such a sweet, sweet word.
Now I just have to think of a way to slide it into next week's team meeting!
I could just .....
Oct. 17th, 2006 02:19 pmNow I know I am getting on in years and the younglings have all these new-fangled words and things but some things cross a line, even for a crotchety, foul-mouthed bastard like me!
To wit, I am walking down a corridor at work. Two young guys are approaching me and one of them has obviously got some good news which he is really happy about. Much woohoo-ing and horseplay ensues. Just as they walk past me, I caught the tail end of a very excited sentence (and I know with 100% certainty that I heard this correctly) " ..... and that is just so cool. I'm so happy I could just lick my own ass! You know what we ..... "
Now I am all for celebrating but even this old reprobate draws the line at licking his own ass! I mean - what the fuck? Even if it was just an expression (and I suspect that he wasn't really drawing up his plans for the evening when he said that!), how does that expression capture excitement or fun or celebration or whatever the hell it was he was trying to say?
I just don't get the youth of today.
OK, I'll put the crotchety old bastard away now!
To wit, I am walking down a corridor at work. Two young guys are approaching me and one of them has obviously got some good news which he is really happy about. Much woohoo-ing and horseplay ensues. Just as they walk past me, I caught the tail end of a very excited sentence (and I know with 100% certainty that I heard this correctly) " ..... and that is just so cool. I'm so happy I could just lick my own ass! You know what we ..... "
Now I am all for celebrating but even this old reprobate draws the line at licking his own ass! I mean - what the fuck? Even if it was just an expression (and I suspect that he wasn't really drawing up his plans for the evening when he said that!), how does that expression capture excitement or fun or celebration or whatever the hell it was he was trying to say?
I just don't get the youth of today.
OK, I'll put the crotchety old bastard away now!
Bah Humbug!
Dec. 21st, 2005 10:15 pm10 Lessons From The 2005 Christmas Party
1. Even with a 50’s nostalgia theme, Ray Conniff is still shit. Always.
2. It doesn’t matter how true it is, never dedicate “Fat-bottomed Girls” to the receptionist with the phrase “Well, just look at her!”
3. To the asshat carving the hot meat at the buffet, turn your phone off. I don’t care what your plans are for tonight or who’s sucking who off – I just want some fucking turkey on my plate!
4. Hey buddy, it’s called “waiting on a table” for a reason. Hang on, you’re that wanker from the buffet again!
5. If you are going to scan your tits, then make sure you hit ‘Send’, not ‘Send all’ – and did you know that one of your nipples is about half the size of the other one? I do, unfortunately!
6. I don’t care if you have retired and have nothing left to live for – I still don’t want to see your ass.
7. If you are going to screw her in one of the cubicles in the men’s toilets, find out whether she’s a screamer first. Also move your ass away from the door so you don’t crash into it on every backstroke.
8. If you are going to whine and bitch about the dickhead director (that you have never met) who couldn’t find her own ass if you gave her a map, make sure it’s not her you are whining and bitching to!
9. It doesn’t matter how many reds you’ve had, you still can’t fucking sing – especially not “We are the champions”!
10. I hate you all and this just reminds why I need to get another job.
1. Even with a 50’s nostalgia theme, Ray Conniff is still shit. Always.
2. It doesn’t matter how true it is, never dedicate “Fat-bottomed Girls” to the receptionist with the phrase “Well, just look at her!”
3. To the asshat carving the hot meat at the buffet, turn your phone off. I don’t care what your plans are for tonight or who’s sucking who off – I just want some fucking turkey on my plate!
4. Hey buddy, it’s called “waiting on a table” for a reason. Hang on, you’re that wanker from the buffet again!
5. If you are going to scan your tits, then make sure you hit ‘Send’, not ‘Send all’ – and did you know that one of your nipples is about half the size of the other one? I do, unfortunately!
6. I don’t care if you have retired and have nothing left to live for – I still don’t want to see your ass.
7. If you are going to screw her in one of the cubicles in the men’s toilets, find out whether she’s a screamer first. Also move your ass away from the door so you don’t crash into it on every backstroke.
8. If you are going to whine and bitch about the dickhead director (that you have never met) who couldn’t find her own ass if you gave her a map, make sure it’s not her you are whining and bitching to!
9. It doesn’t matter how many reds you’ve had, you still can’t fucking sing – especially not “We are the champions”!
10. I hate you all and this just reminds why I need to get another job.
