catalyst2: (Default)
catalyst2 ([personal profile] catalyst2) wrote2007-11-30 11:11 pm
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Movie Review #48 - Gabriel

Shoot me! Shoot me now! Please?

First check of the watch - three minutes in, four minutes, 4:30, 4:45, 4:50 .....


The Matrix meets Blade Runner meets Children of Men except this is the version where Neo *really* has absolutely no emotions, the version where there is no twist in the tail (or indeed anything even vaguely resembling a decent plot) and this is the one where the cinematography is jerky and erratic for no good reason!

Holy fuck - what an appalling movie!

Any actor appeared in this needs to go hide for the next five years until we forget that they had any part in it! The writers need to have their eyeballs impaled on sharp pencils. The director needs to go stand in the gray dreary rain for fifteen years just to see how entertaining that is - because I think I aged fifteen years watching this movie! And don't get me started on just how many cliches they trotted out for this sad mess!

The good points - not a one, drivel from beginning to end!

Holy fuck - what an appalling movie!

[identity profile] asgaja.livejournal.com 2007-11-30 03:22 pm (UTC)(link)
You're making me wanna see it just because it sounds sooo bad!

[identity profile] catalyst2.livejournal.com 2007-12-01 07:50 am (UTC)(link)
Don't do it to yourself! Some movies are so bad they are good but this one is so bad that you will exhaust your entire year's supply of eyebleach in about ten minutes. One thing did occur to me after writing my comments that could possibly be a redeeming feature - there is an enormous slash potential in almost every scene. Could generate an entire pile of angsty slash fic all on its own!